fuck you february

When will February end? Seriously. It's the longest damned month. The calendar is a big fat liar. It is apparently: American Heart Month. Library Lovers Month. Black History Month. Children's Dental Health Month. National Cherry Month. National Embroidery Month. National Grapefruit Month. National Snack Food Month. National Wild Bird Feeding Month. Responsible Pet Owners' Month. I can get behind any of that. Those all sound great. But can they all be over already? I think I'm going to have to use a few of my precious vacation days next month, because bleah. I guess if I lived in the southern hemisphere it would probably be July or August that I hated. But I don't live there, so fuck you, February.

Next week is my review. My boss tells me it's all good, she's really happy with where I am, my progress, etc. So that's good. We'll see if it means more money. That would also be good. Patrick tells me that it will be prorated, since I've only been here six months. Well, that's still something. It's a stupid policy, because it's a whole year until the next raise, but they could give me nothing and it would still be a whole year until the next raise, so I guess if I get any cash it's all good.

I have been kind of moving right along lately at my job. I keep tackling problems and solving them. P tells me I've been good in a couple of his meetings. Feeling ok about all of it. I am enjoying the actual work. There are a lot of political maneuverings and machinations all around me, but so far it doesn't really involve me. I have a friend there (not P) who's in the thick of it and so I hear all about it from her, but we're in different groups so I am mostly insulated from it.

I have been very appreciative of the "no micromanaging" policy of my company, especially lately. When I started my boss told me that as long as the work gets done, no one is terribly bothered by clock-punching or facetime, and that I should just use my best judgement about things. I have used this rather liberally lately, as the weather has been terrible. Why should I go out on the roads and risk anyone's life if I don't have to? And it's fine. At my last job, it was a constant battle and stress and anxiety, but here it's nothing. I don't even have to tell anyone. I just stay home and log in and work. There's a guy who sits behind me that hasn't been in for almost two weeks now, and I don't think anyone other than me has noticed. (He has kids, it's school vacation. Pretty sure that's the reason.)(I've mostly noticed because about three weeks ago he dropped a bright green notebook on the floor in his cube, and despite being in a couple times, didn't bother to pick it up. Every day that I walk in past it I notice it, so I'm sort of tracking how long before it's off the floor. Secretly I hope he never picks it up. Statement of slobbishness or ennui? I choose ennui.)

SO basically work is good. I just wish I could get my shit together at home. Practically every single night looks like this: leave work sometime between 5:30-6:30. Pick up something at a store, usually for mother. Come home, make dinner. Eat dinner, tidy up. Do chore (sometimes trash, sometimes laundry, sometimes just load the dishwasher). Turn on desktop computer and tv, zone out playing FreeCell and reading the internet and watching tv. Phone alarm reminds me to go to bed. Get in bed with iPad, catch up on Words with Friends and Scramble with Friends. Read a bit of my current book. Sleep.

I seriously need to do more! I have somewhere between four and five hours of non-chores time after work before sleep, and I'm not using it productively at all. No jewelry making, no walking, no elaborate house cleaning, no organizing, no projects. Nothing! If nothing else I should get some more damned sleep.

Well, at least I can manage that last one tonight.