llcoolvad | i has a meh

Kinda all over the map this week. There have been dreadful events (car accident, murder) that have happened to friends or family of friends. There have been good events (another friend got engaged AND promoted in the same two week period). And some medium events: Mom is making some progress trying to be more independent (went to the laundromat herself this week, twice! she can't really go down into the basement to use the washer anymore). Brian's been on a bunch of interviews. Several people are sick. Two friends and I had to cancel getting together three different times in the last three weeks.

I'm clearly in a burning bridges kind of mood. I've been a bit more pointed at work. Corrected my boss today. Twice. I've given harsh opinions on things that I might have soft-pedaled. I wrote a complaint to a newspaper "journalist" and signed my own name. I'm feeling sorta frantic, I think. My gut has been hurting off and on for months (probably med-related). Today I have a cold and a big giant zit (hello, 46 years old! enough with that bullshit!). My problems are pretty minor, but stress seems to be eating me up. And things aren't bad on a day to day basis! So why all the stress?

I think I need a new job more than anything else, but leaving a job that I'm already good at and that clearly still has some job security (11 years and counting) in this economy seems foolish, especially without a clear plan. I've got to figure out some coping mechanisms in the short-term. Ways to feel better mentally AND physically. I don't think I've read this much or watched this much television maybe ever, and they're not working well enough as distractions. Brief moments of shiny, then back to run-of-the-mill angst.

At least it's almost April. Spring is here, spring is here. Life is skittles and life is beer.